Was the aptly titled name of my Improv group that performed last night, opening the show for the cast of 30 Rock. When I say ‘opened the show’ I mean that we were the show directly followed by the live cast of 30 Rock. I saw Alec Baldwin, dressed in a suit, carrying his own bag. He is a large man and seemed to be in very good spirits. I asked him how he felt when David Mamet offered him the role in Glen Garry Glenn Ross and he told me to go f*ck myself, which I understand. It was a sort of stupid actor-y question I could have left to some other groupie.
Has your girlfriend ever complained in the morning? Not just a complaint, but a list of complaints? Could be three things. Could be four. Could be five and you stop her.
Today, I got….
1. The floor is so sticky I can’t even walk on it.
2. The baby is crying so much I can’t Continue reading Has your girlfriend?
I joined a Public Bath House for 75 dollars a year. It has an outdoor pool an indoor pool, a ping pong table, a snooker table, and a full gym.
What’s the catch?
Today there was a small skirmish in the rec room. Someone was found Continue reading Public Bath House
After the initial, “Hey, do you know if they have Guiness here,” do you get tongue tied or just become basically at a complete loss for words? Me too. How to Start a Conversation and Make Friends, is the perfect book Continue reading Keeping the Conversation Going Strong
I look at women more than I do men. I look at everyone. But when it comes to looking at boobs, I look at women’s more. I look at ass from both Continue reading Guilty
The most time consuming events in my day in order of most time suckage.
Feeding my son.
Holding my son when he’s crying.
Picking ingrown hairs while I think about shit.
Deciding to clean the house then talking myself out of it.
Thinking about ex girlfriends and how (if I were with them) much worse my life would be.
My girlfriend and I spend our nights swimming in a public pool. There are three lanes with three signs hung up on the walls indicating the three speeds at which you can swim. SLOW. MEDIUM. FAST. My girlfriend was swimming in the MEDIUM lane when this older man (60’s) wearing a bathing cap, goggles, and a blue speedo, breast stroked behind her and shouted, Continue reading Free Swim