Master Cleanse Day 1.

It has been 24 hours since I have ingested any type of solid food for I have begun the Lemonade diet. Lemons, B-grade maple syrup, cayenne pepper, and distilled water is the only form of nourishment I plan on having for the next 10 days. I have fasted many times before. By many I mean four or five, each fast lasting no shorter than three days and no longer than five. This time around, however, is different. It’s scary. I don’t mean, to go so long without eating (some people do it for 40 days). I mean the power that comes with knowing you are not eating. The power on the subway when Continue reading Master Cleanse Day 1.


Is it bad to have one cigarette a day? One cigarette. That’s nothing. Plus, on every pull from the filter, i let some of the smoke leave my mouth so I don’t inhale the whole gulp. Do the math! That’s like half a cigarette. Plus I’m not just sucking the whole time; I take breaks. Sometimes I let it dangle in my hand. Take off a bit more. I usually enjoy my cigarettes, after I’ve worked out, gone swimming, or Continue reading Smoking


At the local farmers market, in Union Square, my girlfriend purchased a basket of plums. My sons usual dinner of puree pees and sweet potatoes, was now, happily interrupted. Cutting around the pit, she laid out the lumps of crimson on his green and blue plastic chair. Having just read another chapter of the History of the World, Early Indian Civilization, I entered Continue reading Plums


variety puzzles

This picture’s way too big. I’ll figure out how to reduce the size at some point. This is in our cabana right before we made our way to the beach. The path to the beach was a sandy tour through jungle on one side and sea on the other. In the early morning before the sun rose I went walking with my kid through the jungle toward the ocean and we’d walk on the beach with him on my shoulders. At dusk Continue reading Mexico


George Bernard Shaw wrote…

….Life as it appears to us in our daily experience is an unintelligible chaos of happenings. You pass Othello in the bazaar in Aleppo, Iago on the jetty in Cyprus, and Desdemona in the nave of St. Mark’s in Venice without the slightest clue to their relations to one another. It is the business of the writer to pick out the significant incidents from the chaos of daily happenings and arrange them so that their relation to one another becomes significant, thus changing us from bewildered spectators of a monstrous confusion to men intelligently conscious of the world and its destinies.

What happened to me yesterday in the order I remember… Continue reading occurences

From us to here

I had a dream last night that I was waiting for my best friend Paul and my brother to get out of some building, it was not going to blow up and there was no real hurry but nonetheless I was waiting. After much wasting of time (being in a truck, trying to find a static-free radio station, my high school ex girlfriend keeping me company, a current girlfriend of my girlfriend opened the car door to tell me, “I have your seed in me; We share a seed.” Whatever the fuck that means, I made a face Continue reading From us to here

I read subtext yesterday!

I was at the Canadian Consul securing Canadian citizenship for my son in the meeting room where a woman is helping me organize my forms behind a bullet proof glass and as the meeting was about to close she asked, “Is he still there?” He was on the floor playing but there was so much glee in her eyes. So much playful concern for him. So much surprise and happiness that he hadn’t made a peep Continue reading I read subtext yesterday!

We Are Not 30 Rock

Was the aptly titled name of my Improv group that performed last night, opening the show for the cast of 30 Rock. When I say ‘opened the show’ I mean that we were the show directly followed by the live cast of 30 Rock. I saw Alec Baldwin, dressed in a suit, carrying his own bag. He is a large man and seemed to be in very good spirits. I asked him how he felt when David Mamet offered him the role in Glen Garry Glenn Ross and he told me to go f*ck myself, which I understand. It was a sort of stupid actor-y question I could have left to some other groupie.

Elan Zafir’s misemployment of the run-on sentence