I was writing…

Megan Graves & Elan Zafir
Photo by Teresa Wood
Folger Theatre Production of King John

A Starbucks in Washington, DC.
And this woman who was seated with three other women—were normal enough.
I noticed one asked another table to borrow an iPhone charger.
Nothing weird about that.
If anything, I noticed that she asked in a way that I would definitely give her mine.
It was slow, and cautious.
She took her time with her words.
And the table next to them, let them borrow the charger.
And Okay fine.
There was a woman I was staring at.
She was extremely thin.
but not in a sick way.
In a European—this is me—way.
Whatever, I liked her.
bid deal.
As they are leaving.
One of the four
(No the one I like)
Said “I hope you weren’t listening to our conversations.”
I said “I heard everything.”
Being funny, but also secretly hoping they were talking about me
Then suddenly I could get the European girls number.
For the record I do not think she was European.
She then says “I’m going to pray for you.”
I was so taken aback,
I said “you’re going to what?”
“I’m going to pray for you.”
She touched my shoulder and said

This man needs our help.
This man has had things taken.
This man has had things taken from him.

My mind went absolutely insane.
What was taken from me?
She was speaking in such an incredible hushed tone.
I believed every word she said.
What was taken from me?
I couldn’t even conjure an image in my mind.
I think my life is wonderful.
I’m lucky for everything I have.
I couldn’t think of a single person that’s hurt me.

You know this, Jesus.
And he not only needs what was taken from him.
He will be repaid tenfold.
This man, oh Jesus, needs to be returned payment in FULL.
This I beg of you, Jesus Christ. Master of my Domain.
King of Kings.”

I thanked her.
What else could I do?
It was like a performance.
And she walked away.
She had such incredible power.
Praying really is powerful.
She asked God for help.
For me.

That was so nice.
Though she had such a hard edge to her voice.
I hope no one gets hurt.

I still feel her hand on my shoulder.

she’s on her play-mat

Another birthday come and gone.
A child is five and a half months old.
She is eating breast milk and rice.
Rice cereal.
It’s a single grain cereal.
One child is eating rice.
Another child is boxing.
And again, I’m father of the year.
Keep hearing stories,
“Be careful with your dog!”
“Dog and new babies don’t mix!”
“Like oil and vinegar!”
“Or, cats and paper
Continue reading she’s on her play-mat

Elan Zafir’s personal ‘The Unaccompanied Minor’ is a top pick this week at the Fringe Festival

Elan Zafir’s autobiographical solo “The Unaccompanied Minor” is a high point in the ongoing Capital Fringe Festival in Southwest D.C., says Roger Catlin, who also checks out the Parkland-based school-shooting drama “14,” while Celia Wren reviews DanceArtTheater’s “Through the Wall.”

“The Unaccompanied Minor” sounds like the Fringe show that will address border separations.

Rather, it is Elan Zafir’s explosive depiction of his own personal heartbreak — seeing his son just four times a year by going through the maddening airport process of transferring unaccompanied youth between divorced couples as if they were prisoner exchanges. Even with the bureaucratic hoops of airport pickup complete, it’s only the beginning of the struggle, as father and son relearn how to relate to each other every time.

Zafir’s impassioned portrayal, intensified within the intimate confines of the walls of a paneled Christ United Methodist Church meeting room, takes him through his own childhood of broken connections, disappointments and a jolting move from Canada to Florida, embodying a dozen characters along the way in whip-smart, breakneck fashion.

The athletic Zafir, who appeared most recently in Mosaic Theater’s “The Vagrant Trilogy,” has devised a show with layers of theatricality that crackle from its use of quick flashbacks, rising tension and even the appearance of Rambo. It culminates in the brilliant juxtaposition of a custody hearing with a high school gang fight.

More than a great Fringe offering,”The Unaccompanied Minor” is a cathartic attempt to vault the myriad walls that can divide father and child.

Roger Catlin — The Washington Post


sometimes i have these waking dreams.
someone is always doing something mundane
cleaning out papers
marking up a script
they all take place in rehearsal though.
that is the binding fact.
someone will be speaking on a subject
usually it’s not to me
and as they are beginning to make their point
they’ll refer to their notes and break eye contact with their audience
and in that moment of “is this right?”
“Am I where I need to be”
“Can I support this argument”
Is when I know I’ve been here before.

Now skeptics will say
It is the essence
Continue reading mosaic


12:AM 8 February 2018
You cry a lot.
You smile a your mother.
You have a strong neck.
You (kinda) enjoy playtime on pack-n-play.
You have blue eyes.
I have given you the bottle, while your mother goes on a run.
That only took five weeks.
All in all…
I’m smitten.


Do bad reviews bother actors?

The short answer—most professional actors don’t care.
Having said that…
Look at all actor websites in the world (mine included),
You will see [in bold]
Positive highlights of said reviews.
Personally, I loooove reading a bad review.
Especially when they say something bad about an actor I know really well.
I know the actor is great.
I’ve probably
Continue reading Do bad reviews bother actors?

Character Monologue: REG

Way of the World by Theresa Rebeck
Costumes by Linda Cho
Set by Alexander Dodge.

(Left to Right: Luigi Sottile, Elan Zafir, Brandon Espinoza)
Photo by Teresa Wood.

Two men at a table in a restaurant.
Henry, I want to talk to you.
Sure what’s up, Reg?
I’m not going be around much longer.
Golfing in Hawaii?
Gambling in Vegas?
Shrooms in Bangkok?
Henry, I got Stage IV Cancer.
That’s hysterical.
Not sure why that’s funny.
Oh, you are awesome!
It’s all over my pancreas, Henry. All in my seamen. I had sex with a prostitute yesterday morning. I haven’t done that in ten days. I wanted to do so much. I wanted to
Continue reading Character Monologue: REG

How to Build a Bed

There are the seven stages of man,
And there are the times you’ve built beds.
When you’re in your twenties,
Have a nineteen year old girlfriend,
Who moves out of her mom’s
Is a very unique circumstance.
Sure you’ve been dating for two years,
Obligated to help,
But you’re leaving.
You’re moving off,
She’s moving on,
“I’ll never love anyone like I love you.”
And it’s true.
And you find yourself,
Holding an allen key;
Surrounded by pine,
And 32 pages of
Worldless instructions:
“Welcome to you’re new Tarva Bed!”

She moves books
You scratch
Continue reading How to Build a Bed

Kevin Spacey: An Interview

ME: Holy Shit.
KEVIN: Right.
ME: Holy shit.
KEVIN: I know. And it was going so well.
ME: Thank you for meeting me.
KEVIN: You’re about the only person who’ll talk to me right now, so it’s not like I can do better.
ME: The fourteen year old.
KEVIN: I know.
ME: Listen—
KEVIN: Don’t—
ME: It’s not what you think. I’m obviously not on your side…
KEVIN: Obviously.
ME: But the first thing I thought when I heard it was… where are that kids parents?
ME: What are they Continue reading Kevin Spacey: An Interview

Elan Zafir’s misemployment of the run-on sentence