Category Archives: Things

Mosque

Build it. Seriously. Build it here. Build it on Park Place. Raise the structures two blocks from the site of the old twin towers.

It stands for tolerance, and an undying desire to communicate. Honestly.

For those that lost children, husbands, brothers, wives, nieces, nephews, uncles, fathers, mothers, friends, neighbors—I love, respect, and admire your strength. It makes me strong. I could not imagine losing my son. I would probably kill myself, or spend the rest of my life thinking of reasons why I shouldn’t.

The Mosque being built did not kill your loved ones. Continue reading Mosque

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Persnikety Snit

I enjoyed reading this blurb and you can read the rest of this post here.

I submit to you Exhibit A: the post-baby derriere. Opposed to the pre-baby derriere, the post-baby derriere is wider, plumper and sags with a certain umph. It is characterized by such terms as phat dunk, round mound… you get the point. It’s much more than most men can handle publicly. Usually met with a wince, deep breath, or a conscious effort to resist erection, the post-baby derriere is highly praised for ending slavery, solving the Cuban Missile Crisis (single-cheekedly), and preemptively nominating the first-lady to Maxim’s Top Ten Hot List. Seriously. Don’t underestimate the post-baby derriere’s power. You’ll lose every time.

Go! Habs Go!

From the Habs blog

9:37 am. I’m sitting at my keyboard, already literally feeling butterflies for tonight’s game against the Penguins. Call it a blessing or a curse, but there isn’t a thing outside of my family and friends that I care about… My own hockey career was cut short by the economic realities my family faced in the early 1990s… Even though I stopped playing competitively as a kid… in my mind every time I put blades on my feet, I’m in Game 7 playing for the Canadiens… Fans of this team care. Continue reading Go! Habs Go!

Depersonalization

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“I find myself regarding existence as though from beyond the tomb, from another world; all is strange to me; I am, as it were, outside my own body and individuality; I am depersonalized, detached, cut adrift. Is this madness?”

-Henri Frédéric Amiel

Depersonalization is a dissociative disorder which induces a state of automation, making the afflicted feel “a going through the motions, a disconnection from one’s body, and a difficulty relating oneself to reality.”

Since I quit Continue reading Depersonalization

Child Support Enforcement

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Doesn’t that sound like a real fun place to spend a Saturday?

And on the website, there’s a picture of a young boy and his mother, smiling, running into the ocean, kicking up sand and surf. But if you look a bit closer; just tilt the camera to the left, you ‘ll see that they’re running over the body of the father and kicking up dimes and nickels.

Gliding through the website in happy, happy, glee-like rapture, I found this lovely thread…

Paternity Establishment
When a child is born to unmarried parents, the child has no legal father. Paternity must be established before child support or medical support can be obtained.

Wonderful. Turns out I’m not a father.

Now what kind of a story do I want my child to tell when he’s my age.

“My father left the house when I was two, and because he and my mom were never married, she couldn’t get child support; So technically, he wasn’t my father and more importantly he got out of paying my mom a dime. If I ever see that piece of shit, I’ll punch him in his face.”

Or…..

“My father left the house when I was two, and because he and my mom were never married, she couldn’t get child support; So technically, he wasn’t my father and didn’t have to give my mom any money. But he filled out the form, they enforced an amount that was more than he could afford and every cent he ever worked for was handed over to my mother, leaving him a bitter, angry, failure.”

Well, at least there’s a good side to all this.

Once Upon a Time in the West

I don’t think a woman could sit through this movie. I hope this isn’t being taken as feminist or the opposite of feminist. Or arrogance. I think a woman wouldn’t sit through a net-flixed version of this incredible movie, watched on a laptop, because they happen to be intelligent creatures.

During this film there were some portions that seemed to drag on for my 11:56pm emotions and brain; yet I persisted. I thought…

This is good for you. Watch this film. I know they are taking a long time and no one has said anything in awhile, but it’s moving, it’s going somewhere. I could push the fast forward button, I am very close to it, but I am not going to.

And so forth and so on. A woman would simply fast forward (making sure she didn’t miss anything pertinent to story), or turn it off, restart it at a time when she felt more enlivened/awake/prepared.

I am not a woman.

Someone said to me the other day that I am sensitive. Is that not a compliment? Should a man not hear he is sensitive? It’s kind of one of those back-handed compliments.

If you are on a date, picking up the check and the woman grabs the flower from the small vase on the table and bending the bud to her face says,

Oh, I wonder if these are in season now?” 
You shouldn’t do that you’ll hurt the flower.
You’re so sensitive.

That’s kind of nice.

Whereas if a woman is eating in your house and you made linguini in a white clam sauce and she’s chowing down and finally looks up and says,

“Did you cook these right?” and you say,
I followed the directions I saw online.
But it sounds like you said,
Why do you think I’m not capable of making something pleasant to eat?
“You’re so sensitive.”

That’s like, “Fuck you. I want you to enjoy yourself, you bitch.

Which makes for a poor evening. Point. Once upon a time in the west had real men. Men that hold in their feelings, talk real slow, unafraid to hurt a lady, and carried around firearms. I am feeling slightly insecure.

The movie centered around this elegant seeming lady and it turns out that she’s a whore. I don’t want to ruin it, but there are so many uses of ‘turns out that.’ There’s this one guy played by a young Charles Bronson, and every now and then you wonder what his motives are? What’s driving him? What does he need? What is he after? Why is he after it? And when you find out, its one of those ‘turns out that’ moments. Which works. The film is incredible. It’s beautiful. It’s filled with love and power and intelligence. Its a model. But better. It oozes with personality.

The acting, (by the men especially) is… enchanting. They don’t make people like this anymore, or if they do they aren’t shown this way. I want to copy them. Jason Robards is brilliant. Peter Fonda (I think he is playing against type), he’s this bad boy with blue eyes and he’s supposed to rape this woman but really it just looks like he’s making love with her. Everyone is beautiful in this film. The music is dead on. You’re watching it and you’re thinking what could possibly make this moment better and then…. BOOOOOOOUUUUUUUNNNNNNN! The music comes on and you’re like, “Ooohhhhh.”

I would like to thank everyone that made this movie possible.