I went into the sauna again. There were two men already sitting there when I arrived. One of them was big and dark and sat on the second level with his back to the wood and his long legs outstretched. The other sat hunched over, with his elbows on his knees.
I felt their eyes on me and they’re conversation about different islands slowed down as I took space in the sauna. The big one had a low raspy voice and he used the word “like” a lot, except he didn’t use it as most people use it to say “it’s sort of” he used it as an “um.”
The hunched over man had a long back and muscular arms.
The two spoke about the differences of islands. They talked about a place where the water is clear and no motorized boats are permitted. You can take a canoe out to sea and the water glitters at your feet. You can jump in and swim and see your feet glitter. The other one said he had never been to a place like that but wished to go. He said he loved to explore and go places he’s never been.
I began to imagine a dating site where he would write exactly that, and the dating site was interactive so you could click on a link that would take you to the sauna and he would look up into the camera and speak the same words.
The big man left first. The other stretched for a bit. I leaned my head back and closed my eyes and when I opened them he was walking out the door.
I was alone and the heat got more intense and as I picked my head off the wall and hunched over with my elbows on my knees I imagined what would happen if the door was locked. I thought about ripping off a wooden panel. Smashing at the glass door with my elbow. I thought how long it would take for me to fall into a fit of heat. A slow sense of motion, similar to being in extremely high altitude where your mind becomes that of a child. You think slow and you move slower. I felt the heat drag me and my heart closer to the floor. I thought about calling out and heard myself said “hi.”
It became too hot, or I became scared. I got up, walked to the exit pulled the door and left the sauna.