Rafael: Ongoing

You don’t like when people talk to me. Correction. You don’t like when women talk to me—correction, you don’t like when women I don’t know, talk to me.

You do it at the park. You do it at restaurants. You do it on the streets. You start saying Daddy. Daddy. And you’re looking at me, first slightly irritated, then increasingly scared. You say my name, and stare at the woman talking to me. The woman has no choice but to stop talking and look at your two big eyes. And that’s when you stick your finger in your nose. (Another form of defense.) Continue reading Rafael: Ongoing

Unused Material: fairy tale

THE KING was a mess. He was alive and his wife was dead and he couldn’t help but feel not the least bit bad about it.
“I must be a terrible person,” thought the King, as he sat amongst the garden sipping tea. The King had just sunk his teeth into a new book, Get Them Before They Get You, written by the notorious writer and murderer, Samir Black. Samir wrote the book during his time spent in prison. It took him one year to finish, and he wished it took him longer because he was serving out a life sentence.
“I wish I knew about more subjects,” Samir would complain.
The King wanted desperately to know about Samir’s ideology of attacking first. It was the only thing that gave him comfort in these uneasy times. The books three main principles fell out easy:

1. Hit first and with no mercy.
2. Love no one.
3. If you fall in love, go to rule number one.

Flipping through Continue reading Unused Material: fairy tale

Go! Habs Go!

From the Habs blog

9:37 am. I’m sitting at my keyboard, already literally feeling butterflies for tonight’s game against the Penguins. Call it a blessing or a curse, but there isn’t a thing outside of my family and friends that I care about… My own hockey career was cut short by the economic realities my family faced in the early 1990s… Even though I stopped playing competitively as a kid… in my mind every time I put blades on my feet, I’m in Game 7 playing for the Canadiens… Fans of this team care. Continue reading Go! Habs Go!



“I find myself regarding existence as though from beyond the tomb, from another world; all is strange to me; I am, as it were, outside my own body and individuality; I am depersonalized, detached, cut adrift. Is this madness?”

-Henri Frédéric Amiel

Depersonalization is a dissociative disorder which induces a state of automation, making the afflicted feel “a going through the motions, a disconnection from one’s body, and a difficulty relating oneself to reality.”

Since I quit Continue reading Depersonalization

Don’t know

Not really sure what I’m going to say. Went back to my old work today. It was great seeing everyone. It was strange. I didn’t have my phone with me so I guess I acted abnormally, meaning, I acted in ways I wouldn’t have usually acted. It’s different when you know no one is able to contact you. I did things different—you get the idea.
My old work. My old friends. Truth be told, I was thinking about them. I don’t miss the job. The job itself was the pits. I could barely think of anything worse. But Continue reading Don’t know