We are all Fathers

spyThis is where my thinking stray’s. I would not be completely upset if my son had a different Father later in life. Right now he’s with me and I’ll give him everything I’ve got. I realize of course that although I have much to give there are others who also have much to give. Some of you may be thinking, “Ok. Let him learn from those other men who [for instance] know how to chop wood, fix plumbing, talk intelligently about iron-ore; but don’t give your son away.” And let me get back to the ‘giving your son away’ point.
I think well of myself, but I have limits. I don’t think I’ll be able to help him much with his homework and I definitely won’t be the one pushing him to enjoy things I didn’t enjoy. That is a potential issue between me and the Misses. And where ever she goes, my son goes. So. Perhaps I am seeing a situation before it happens and preparing myself. Perhaps I am creating a situation which has yet to occur. Perhaps it’s all crap. Fathers must have a hard time. I never realized it before, because I’d never been a Father before, but as a non-Father, I never experienced moments of inadequacy (lie), I have experienced moments of inadequacy but it was between me and the thing stopping me from being the greatest version of myself. Now with the boy, I can still be the greatest version of myself, and that may be enough for me but is it enough for the boy? For the Missus? What if the boy takes an interest in building things and the misses meets an architect and she falls for him and he’s got a great life and he can provide them both with all sorts of luxuries (homes, travelling, great wine) plus all sorts of human values I do not posses (physics, organization, how to build a table), Why not go with that man? I say do it. My son will not only master all that I can give him, but all that another can give him. That is quite a feat for a young man. And if the mother is happy, usually the son is happy. And me? Anyone that can maneuver intelligently through that sort of emotional roller coaster must have something worth saying. I’ll continue being me, the man I like. And keep having kids. And keep having the Misses leave me for another man with other gifts. Wow! This is a revolution. All children should have more than one Father. Of course this isn’t new. In the times of the Indians (the ones who lived in North America before we changed the name and threw them out), it took a whole tribe to raise a son. Yes, he had one Father, but the tribe taught him to hunt, to fish, to make trip wires, to cook chicken, to harvest the fields. His actual Father may have been good at one of those things, but not ALL. Why should Fathers need to burden themselves with professions or skills they simply do not have? One person can’t possibly be the best at everything. Each individual person excels at something and what I’m trying to say is everyone should have their day in the sun. Now. The product of that tribe. That son, who had oh-so-many Dad’s when he has a child, will know how to do more than his Father did, and so on with his son and so on and so forth.

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2 thoughts on “We are all Fathers”

  1. lame. you should absolutely fight for your son and your woman to be one with you in family. no other man can give your son what you can as a father. you are his dad. you are funny and immediate and generous and colorful. you are his father. and you are the partner to his mother.

  2. Quit whining and suck it up! Be a father and give your son everything you can. Be his role model, be his hero. Don’t be some wimp who gives up. Material things are one thing, but love and compassion is something that can’t be bought.

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